Monday, December 29, 2008

Christmas was good...Christmas Day, itself, anyway. We had family over, ate too much food, laughed, a lot, and my bestie and I took our dogs out for a longish walk, just the two of us with the dogs.

After they left, however, things got a bit hairy. For some reason, Hubby was In A Mood. Not sure why.
The long and short of it is that I spent Christmas night, alone, while he slept on the couch.

Things were no better by morning, and by that night, things were completely out of control.

Hubby flew into a rage. I mean a rage. He was full blown crazy. He punched a huge ass hole into the bedroom wall and left the house, telling me that it was over.

Merry Fuckin' Christmas to me.

He came home the next day. We talked. I still feel...angry. Pissed. No, worse.

I am hurt beyond words.

He has done this to me so many times that I have lost count.

He has ruined the trust that we have built and I feel as though I am (and the kids) expendable as far as he is concerned.

I am just so tired of this. We have been together for more than 7 years and he still has one foot out the door.

I don't know what to do.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Merry Christmas

Happy Holidays to all of my blog buddies - well, Happy Holidays, Walker. Hope Santa gives you everything that you want.
Merry Christmas!

Thursday, December 4, 2008


So...I have been offline for a bit. Lots going on, and then there is the depression thing.


Then there is the family shit.

Hubby's sister has moved her stabbing ex boyfriend back into her house.

Oh yeah, you read that right...The boyfriend (and father of kid number two) stabbed kid number one with a screwdriver just about two months ago.

Kid number two is actually sleeping in empty garages and flopping on couches because, obviously, he is not comfortable sleeping under the same roof as the asshole that jabbed a gapping hole in his side.

Imagine that. The kid is freaked out.

Now, just to back track, this boyfriend (ok, he is in his 40's not exactly a boy) has:

broken SIL's arm

smashed her eye in, giving her a great purple bruise and stitches just in time for Easter

baracaded himself in the house with a then 10 month old infant and SIL, threatening to kill himself

stolen money (diaper money, rent money) from SIL to buy coke

dropped the baby countless times due to the fact that he was drunk and alone with the baby

This is just what I am coming with off of the top of my head. I once had a frantic phone call from SIL asking Hubby and I to rescue her and the kids from the boyfriend when he was abusive....When I showed up, I was told to FUCK OFF, cuz, you know, I am not family.

This is the same sister that can't take a 6 minute bus ride to work (her 70 year old dad drives her everywhere, getting up early and sometimes staying up till the wee hours). She borrowed my cell phone, ran up a $600 bill and paid me 50 fucking bucks on it. Oh yeah, the same 50 bucks that FIL promptly took because we owed him.....

Can you tell that I am pissed?

There is another sister that babysits all of the time, for free, cuz you know, poor woman is overwhelmed. That sister and Hubby's 85 year old mom have the kid more that his mom does.

WHY, oh why is it that she keeps this asshole around? Her family does everything for her, it's not like she has no other support. Boyfriend has NEVER paid any support, even though they have been apart more then they have been together. Not one penny, not even bought his own kid a birthday gift or newe shoes.

He is not only putting her life at risk, but now he is putting her two sons at risk. I mean, LITERALLY. He almost killed kid number one.


I have been some real losers in my time (uh, ex number one and two) but I got the hell out of dodge when my kids were at risk. I had NO help, no family and was on my own. She has everything is still with a jack ass.

I think that if F&CS finds out that Boyfriend is living there, she will lose her son.

You know what else I think?

It might be the best thing that ever happened to him.